By Moses Abeka
The difference between the population of Sheema and Kaboong is attributed to weather, no doubt! All demographic studies should prove that! The reason MUK lectures want higher pay can also be linked to weather, the more the customers….lets not go there. Lets go here, the list of celebrities affected by the cold winds blowing our faces and turning facebook chat louder than Odongo Otto in parliament.
SHARON O, NOT SHARON 0: Just when the banks expected Ivan to add more 0s to O’s account figures, the confused client withdrew the oppournity to revolutionalise the local economy by increasing sales of black studded O’s. The hottest tabloid topic froze to 0 degrees and since 0 is not the first number, she makes number one on the list!
JULIANA KANYOMOZI: After this news reaches Juliana, she will be like,” Bojoo! These news people just cant leave me alone! I wish Kassim were here to punch the hell out of them! Wait a minute…..Kasssim, I would need his punches more! Oh Ruhanga, this coldness is too much! My Kassim, cant you consider a career change to say, Kickboxing! The Maliks and Odekes of this world would be victims! Enough distraction of point of main concern, cant wait for tusker”.
HELLEN LUKOMA: Please, people she is not Patra. Patra is some kind of cloth that came to existance after some whore tore her leggings in protest over the declining number of customers who preferred to spend the cold evenings with mama baby. Okay, Patra is a fictional character on NTV earning Maurice Kirya slaps.( Acting is not for every celeb!) Okay, Lukoma is number three here!
SEANICE: There is only one Seanice, East Africa’s most eligible spinster. She should not be here. Ugandan men, you can do better than this! TOm THE MITH. Word from Ntinda dwellers confirmed that this evening, this rapper ordered for warm ice cream, all madness in the name of coldness! That news inspired this article and I hope it inspires you, the reader to complete this list !