By Ian Ortega
As the saying goes; “In the future everyone will be famous for 15 minutes, don’t screw up your 15 minutes of fame.” 15 minutes of fame is short-lived media publicity or celebrity of an individual or phenomenon. The expression is credited to Andy Warhol, who included the words “In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes” in the program for a 1968 exhibition of his work at the Moderna Museet in Stockholm, Sweden.
In Uganda, we rephrase and say; “in the future, every Ugandan will be famous for 15 Seconds.” It seems the rich gang has not screwed up their 15 seconds of fame, at least, not with their less-than-conventional methods of gaining fame. They have walked around assuring whoever cares that they are rich, own schools, drive plush cars and have the ability to make the entire Kampala drunk; this, while making fools of the most revered celebrities on our streets.
So who are the Ugandans who made the most of their 15 seconds of Fame and for what reason?
1. Bad Black (A former Speke road prostitute who hit the jackpot by mining billions out of his Mzungu lover. She splashed money around, before ending up in Luzira)
2. Meddie Ssentongo (Bad Black’s side dish who made the most of his job, he even donated a BMW to Jose Chameleone)
3. Katsha (A ‘harvard’ graduate who sponsored Bebe Cool’s ‘Everywhere I go’ video. He’s now engaged to a one Shakira. Remembered for appearing in a heavy-fur winter coat at NTV. His rise to fame was about throwing a sushi party that never was. And of course giving out ‘empty’ iPhones to his facebook fans. He owns Tulip colleges and Katsha International College(in his dreams at least).
4. Ivan Ssemwanga (the husband to the driest woman of the land aka Zari)
5. Zari Kirigwajjo (remembered for her desert island sextape. And of late her project with Diamond Platinumz)
6. King Lawrence (the kiss and tell master. From Juliana, to Zari to Huddah Munroe)
What do they do? Sangomas? At least sources in South Africa say so. They are also great friends to Google, they rely on this for the best quotes. Famous culprits include Zari and Katsha.
So are you ready for your own 15 seconds of Fame? Don’t let them pass you. Simply send your sextape and nude photos and we shall publish.
