By Ian Ortega
A random kid aged 12 asked me this question. I came to think of it. The greatest crime a woman can ever commit against me is to catch me cheating. It’s comparable to blasphemy. It’s a sin not worth forgiving.
Let’s put it straight, there’s no way on earth I would forgive such a woman. One, she will have proven herself incapable of trusting me. Secondly, what the heavens is she doing invading my privacy, my personal space?
How does a woman even begin thinking about catching the boyfriend cheating? However much you suspect, even if they tell you that your boyfriend is in some hotel room with a random lady, never, never go there to catch him. Even when he comes back at awkward hours with lipstick on his shirt, pretend you’ve not seen all this, don’t even ask questions about his whereabouts.
You see, a woman who catches a man cheating is idle and disorderly. There’s no way a woman who’s busy cooking at home, doing the laundry, looking after the baby or tending the flower garden at home would have time to go spying on the boyfriend or husband and catch him cheating.
Even when your boyfriend’s phone rings in your presence, and you see a female name there, assume it’s the HRM calling to ask for a report. Even when he begins hissing those sounds of guilty men, the mmmmhhs, ooommm, pretend he is thinking hard about the questions on phone.
Men if you are reading this, the day your girlfriend catches you red-handed cheating is the day the relationship should end. She’s shown herself incapable of overlooking your flaws. Such a girlfriend should be reported to police immediately, she’s capable of killing you. A girlfriend who catches you cheating should be accused of treason. Why would you track down your husband in his paths destined by his biological make-up?
A woman who catches you cheating is a woman that can never be satisfied. On top of the time you give her, she still chooses to intrude on your private time, very ungrateful.
Men, for goodness sake, never apologize when they catch you cheating. You should instead be annoyed, you shouldn’t even listen to anything she has to say, because anything she says can be used against her in court.
Till next time, go cheat in peace…..
Signed
I.O
Chairman, Uganda Boyfriends Association (UBA)
