livestrong.com
Relationships are precious, and nobody can understand the reasons why better than those who are in one themselves. Different relationships are worth saving for different reasons. Some relationships are not worth saving at all, but those that are require special care and dedication to make things work. Whether you and your honey are going through serious issues, or you just aren’t feeling the spark like you used to, noticing that a relationship is damaged is the first step in fixing it.
Step 1
Have a talk with your mate about the problems the two of you are going through. Just because you feel that something is different between the two of you doesn’t necessarily mean he feels it, too. Talk it out with him, and let him know about the things that you think need improvement in the relationship. By having an open, honest discussion, you may find out that he has his own feelings about the relationship that he would like to express.
Step 2
Commit to making things better. For this commitment to mean anything, your mate must make a similar commitment. Some people have relationships that they feel are broken and not worth saving. If you feel differently, commit to saving the relationship and doing whatever it takes to make things better between the two of you.
Step 3
Talk about the old stuff, and then forget about it. Sure, it’s not going to be that easy, but repairing a broken relationship requires forgiveness—and it must be genuine. This step includes forgiving your mate for things she has done and said to hurt you, and forgiving yourself for things that you have done, as well.
Step 4
Consider seeing a counselor. Couples counseling isn’t for everyone, but the Mayo Clinic recommends it as a way to resolve conflicts. They suggest that by seeing a counselor, you and your mate can “make thoughtful decisions about rebuilding your relationship or, in some cases, going your separate ways.” Even if just for a session or two, couples counseling might enable both parties to get a different perspective on the relationship.
Step 5
Spend more quality time together. This doesn’t mean that you should spend every waking moment together, but more quality time as a couple outside of counseling is an important step in repairing a damaged relationship. It may help to have a “date night” set aside for the week, in which the two of you spend time together doing something fun.
Step 6
Work on it every day. Fixing a broken relationship is not like fixing a broken table leg. You can’t do it all in one day, and it will take continuous work to maintain. In the end, a happy and healthy love life is well worth the trouble.
