After enough men and enough mishaps, you realize that there are some things men just didn’t get the memo on when it comes to the woman’s body. Like these:
We need 4-play
For men, 4-play is a privilege. It’s like whipped cream on top of an already incredible sundae. For women, it’s essential. Without enough 4-play, sex can actually be painful for a woman and even cause small tears in the vajayjay.
Post-coital cuddling
Did you know that when you orgasm, a chemical is released in your body that instantly makes you feel more trusting of the person who gave you that orgasm? That’s why it is particularly hurtful when a guy just rolls away and makes a sandwich immediately after sex. We feel chemically more vulnerable than ever.
Harder never means faster
Ever had a man move like a jack hammer while you’re having sex? It does nothing for a woman. But sometimes, when we say “harder” they hear “faster” and then, as our head is repeatedly hitting the headboard, we regret saying anything at all.
We don’t all PMS
The worst thing that ever happened in the world of menstruation is that men got wind of PMS. Now, if you show any emotion other than complete apathy while on your period, your boyfriend says, “Uh oh, you’re PMS’ing!” And you feel like any of your emotions during menstruation are written off as just that. But guess what? Not all women experience symptoms of PMS! Most women who do, know it. So if a woman is saying, “I really am not PMS’ing! I’m actually pissed!” she is probably telling the truth.
No sex on a full stomach
We know—you think there is nothing sexier than a woman willing to get down on a double chili cheeseburger and onion rings at dinner. But, women don’t want to have sex on a full stomach! Not only do we have a visibly bloated stomach, we can also just become nauseated and feel far too heavy to move around. If we want a salad, men should just let us get a salad. They will be grateful for it in the bedroom.
2+ drinks=0 orgasms
A woman’s ability to orgasm drops drastically with every cocktail. So, whether a guy is trying to liquor you up for a one-night stand, or your long time boyfriend is trying to loosen you up after a sexual dry spell, that’s not the way to go!
We need to mentally prepare for sex
As a woman, you can basically just say to your man, “Let’s have sex” and all of his equipment is ready to go. But for women, it doesn’t work that way. Preparing for sex happens long before you even lay a finger on us. We need to mentally prepare. We need to be relaxed. We need to have been perhaps cuddling with you for a while. We’re complex creatures with a lot happening in our minds and if we hadn’t started imagining having sex before it was even initiated, we can’t fully get into it.
90 degrees does nothing for us
Sure, you get a great view when we’re sitting on top of you, completely erect creating a 90 degree angle with our two bodies, but we hardly feel anything. To please us, on top of clit-0ral stimulation you need to be putting pressure on certain spots inside the vaginal canal. And simply going in and out doesn’t hit those spots. Try a 45-degree angle instead.
We love back of the neck kisses
If your girlfriend has her back turned towards you and is asleep or resting and you’re trying to get things started, don’t jump on top of her or try to role her over. Just kiss the back of her neck and her upper back, while simultaneously putting your hands all over the front of her. This double stimulation of the front and backs of our bodies works wonders for us.
You need to finish us off
Men whine and complain about being blue balled but it happens to us women, too! It doesn’t necessarily cause us pain but coming very near orgasm, and then being cut off, can leave our vagina in a state of high sensitivity and discomfort. Not to mention it leaves us in a bad mood. If you came too soon, and left us high and dry (figuratively speaking) take a few minutes to breath but then get to work with your hands and/or mouth.
Gentle is key
Push on your own arm and drag your fingers up it. Now, just barely touch your arm and do the same thing. The second act feels better, right? Feels that way for women too. Keep that in mind when kissing our ears, touching our back or in any way applying pressure to us.
Source: Madamenoire