By Ian Ortega
We have those Ugandan celebs who are naturally, forever young. The same way you saw them 5 years back is the same way you will see them 5 years from now. We release our top 10.
1. Ragga Dee: Whatever he eats, it must be working very well. No wrinkles, just a little grey hair yet he claims to be the grandfather of the current Ugandan artistes. This guy never grows old, we don’t know his secret, but Desire Luzinda could pick a leaf just to make us believe her 25 year age story without struggling.
2. Halima Namakula: The way I saw her while I was still in primary three is the same way she still looks. Analysts have it that in 5 years’ time, her daughter Rachael K may actually look older than Halima. But Halima is way beyond her early 50s yet she still looks stunning like a 30 year old, no wonder young boys keep hitting on her. Halima, what do you consume in private that we don’t know about?
3. Bebe Cool and Zuena: Now this is another couple in their own league. They never grow old, any serious mistake, a tycoon can easily run away with Zuena because she’s still classic. Last time, when I saw her in a Kitenge, I was like WTF, Barbie on the other-hand seems to be growing older day by day and at least Bobi Wine’s lips seem to be getting bigger.
4. MC Kats: Ohhh yeah, the midget of the Entertainment industry, this one just decided to put his looks on pause. When I grow up, I am going to adopt MC Kats as my teenage son in revenge for making me feel jealousy in those days when he was a co-presenter with Flavia Tumusiime.
5. Flavia Tumusiime: When I was in primary school, I made a wish to God that Flavia should wait for me to grow up so that I can date her. Well, seems God is answering the wish, Flavia seems to have given a reject to aging. Well, Flash, my wish is the secret not the gym you go to, please call me while stock lasts.
6. MUN-G: This one still looks like a fresher at Campus. All he’s missing, is a brown envelope and some Thomas in wonderland look (which of course he seems to act out in his music videos). It seems musicians must be taking a secret herb that’s making them stay young forever.
7. Roger Mugisha: Okay, I began hearing of Roger Mugisha when I was joining Primary One, some good years down the road, over 2 decades, I still hear of Roger and girls still yearn for his attention. No wrinkles, no grey hair, nothing on his face to show that he’s been around the scene for some good time. Celebs have come and gone, Bebe Cool stopped stepping on tables, Bobi Wine finally stuck to Kadongo-kamu but Roger Mugisha is still Roger Mugisha.
8. Peter Ssematimba: At least, this one proves to us that make-up can do wonders. He is another forever young dude, even his accent is forever American. I first heard of Ssematimba back then when CBS was beginning, before he spoilt us with his column in CHIC magazine where he was teaching us how to kiss. He has been all sorts of things in this country; I hear he’s now a pastor.
9. Ugandan Pastors: Even though, they are getting some grey hair, but it’s not at the rate that we expected this grey hair to come on. People like Pastor Sserwadda, Pr.Kayanja, Pr.Kakande, Pr.Kiwewa are old like Mzee but Mzee has aged more than them. They have been here since the times of Obiri Yeboah and the fights among the Pentecostals that were physical. It’s either you are eating too much prayer and holy spirit or you are eating too much money.
10. Pr. Wilson Bugembe: My cousin was a senior one student at Lubiri SSS when he used to attend Pr.Bugembe’s talks at the school. That was somewhere in 1999, before the world knew of Bugembe. But he confesses that Bugembe had the same looks. Over two decades down the road, Bugembe still looks super youthful and is still single. He makes us believe the Bible Verse that says: “They that trusteth the Lord shall not grow old or weary…they shall stay young like the eagles in the skies… (oba is that the right verse?)