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10 Red flags you should never ignore in a new relationship

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You meet someone who’s simply charming. You’re excited about this person and begin dating, spending more and more time together. Everything is going great, except that your new partner slips into certain ‘bad habits’ here and there. You can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t quite right.

Seemingly insignificant tendencies can be early indicators of greater issues that will rear their ugly head in time.

Honour your well-being by walking away from an unhealthy relationship sooner rather than later, if your partner gives off the following red flags:

1. Your intuition nags you

People know how to lie, but your intuition doesn’t. The first one to tell you something is wrong will be your inner voice. Pay close attention to gut feelings that ask you to analyse your partner’s intentions, words, and actions more closely. Refrain from making excuses for this person just because you have strong feelings. Be honest with yourself and acknowledge when your partner isn’t acting in good faith or isn’t making you happy. Take divine signs seriously: it’s not an accident if you come across something that proves this person lied or isn’t who he says he is.

2. It’s complicated from the beginning

There is no perfect partner because everyone carries a bit of baggage (even you). That’s normal.

What’s not normal is a person who hauls entire loads from their past into your present life. Your partner may have children from a previous relationship, but his children shouldn’t make your life miserable. Your partner may have trust issues from past experiences, but his trust issues shouldn’t force you to prove your every move.

If a relationship starts off this burdensome, it will only require more effort with time. Release it from your life and find a love that’s light-hearted, pure, and joyful.

3. Won’t compromise

The couple who wan’t compromise can’t survive. A person’s (in)ability to compromise quickly becomes evident. Your partner should be offering compromise freely at this point, and you should be taking turns giving in to each other. The fact that he doesn’t means the relationship will entail much sacrifice on your part.

4. Has mood swings

Steer clear of the person who veers to moody extremes because this will ruin your emotional stability. Your partner shouldn’t leave you exhausted by the end of the day! You become who you’re around, and if you’re exposed to anger, bitterness, or resentment, you might find yourself becoming a person you don’t want to be, riding an emotional roller coaster that will take a mental and physical toll on you.

If your partner shifts from delighted to depressed in seconds, understand that a psychological imbalance exists. And if he or she gets angry over everything, know that this anger may spill out onto you one day, too.

5. Not generous

Generosity takes many forms, the most obvious being monetary. But a person must also be giving with his time, affection, advice and good intentions. Stinginess, greediness and egoism are serious red flags. While you shouldn’t expect to receive the world on a silver platter, you should expect your partner to offer help when you’re in genuine need. Remember, the person who wants to share his world with you is preparing for a future with you.

Generosity is rare, so be grateful for the partner who is giving in all senses of the word.

6. Chronic infidelity

Mom used to say that “once a cheater always a cheater”. I don’t quite agree, because we have the potential to break even our worst patterns. But if you discover your new partner being disloyal from this early on, spare yourself the heartbreak and move along. Chances are that he was prone to dishonesty long before you and will continue to be this way throughout the relationship with you.

Often, we hope we can change people or mould their character, or that they will somehow be ‘different’ with us than they’ve been in their past relationships. Then we experience deep disappointment when we realise that we can’t change anybody. He must change himself.

7. Treats others poorly

Be careful becoming too attached to the person who talks down to others, is rude without reason, or has negative relationships with family members. People who have problems with themselves often release them upon others, and these problems can’t be resolved until they look within and eliminate the real cause. Your partner may treat you nicely in the beginning, but the same issues he has with other people in his life will creep into your own relationship down the line.

8. Comes and goes

It’s demoralising when your partner doesn’t check up on you or simply say hello. One of the most frequent complaints I hear from my clients is that their new partner doesn’t initiate conversation; they have to be the ones to send the first message, or there’s no telling when the person will actually call. Even worse is when he shows a pattern of disappearing then reappearing like nothing happened.

Beware of settling with a partner who’s emotionally ignorant or distant. You will find yourself telling this person the same thing repeatedly, and it’ll go in one ear and come out the other. One of the greatest qualities you can find in a partner is someone who is so emotionally intimate with you that he knows what you need before you even get the chance to ask.

9. Doesn’t take care of himself

The way in which someone treats (or mistreats) himself is reflective of the way he will treat you. If your partner is self-destructive, how can he strengthen you? If he’s completely careless with his home, job, belongings, health, finances, or appearance, chances are he won’t be able to lend you the care you need and deserve.

Look for someone who handles himself responsibly, lovingly and gently so that he can treat you in this same manner.

10. Can’t commit

Lasting relationships are the deeply fulfilling bonds we crave, but not all of us are able to uphold them. You should be with a partner who not only wants to fortify a relationship with you through time, but who understands the hard work needed to do so. Consider your partner’s dating history: has he or she been able to maintain at least one serious relationship? It will be difficult for your partner to keep up long-term love if he’s used to jumping from romance to romance. A partner who both expresses the desire for commitment and reinforces words with actions is a real treasure.

Our impulses often predict our true nature. Reflect on these ten red flags before engaging in a new relationship, and put your own well-being first.

Source: All4women.co.za

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Celebrity Gossip

Zahara Totto opens up on why her relationship with ‘Big Papa’ failed

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By BigEyeUg Team

Next Media, Zahara Totto is still mending a broken heart after breaking-up with Nigerian money bag, Don Solomon Ugwu aka Big Papa (Oga).

The ‘Uncut’ TV show host’s one-year affair with Don Solomon was confirmed done and dusted on Monday, 10th August after a bitter fight between the two lovers.

However, Zahara has since taken it to her Snap chat account spilling all the unbearable circumstances that sparked their misunderstandings.

The motor-mouthed TV presenter, narrates that all went wrong in her relationship when she found-out that boyfriend, Big Papa was sleeping around with other women.

She reveals that her efforts in resolving the issues together with hubby all ended in vain after he refuted all claims of cheating.

He instead continued sharing their bed with all kinds of city girls.

The mother-of-four also says Big Papa is disrespectful, non-developmental, adds no value to no one, among others, and that’s why she never regrets breaking-up with him.

Zahara further says she can’t take his behaviors anymore or stand him because he is disgusting.

Here is her statement in full;

Allow me tell you a short story. I have been busy working the anus decided to sleep with every slut who cares to open their legs to him thinking they will get rich from him! Such low thinking brains!

Am a one-man woman, and when I found out that’s the case I tried to talk to him so we solve things where it had gone wrong as I didn’t want the relationship to end! But the anus used that to his advantage to continue with his Ashawo behavior of sleeping with more sluts.

I was in Love cos we have been together for a year now! Didn’t want it to lose /

my man! But all in vain. The anus is disrespectful, non-developmental, adds no value to no one, etc.

He is threatening me right now for exposing is bleached jik pussy selling bitch who has worked so had to see that me and the anus separate. I can nolonger take it in anymore! I can’t stand him anymore! He disgusts me.

We will keep you posted.

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Celebrity Gossip

Video: Zahara Totto beaten by hubby, Big Papa before bitter split

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By BigEyeUg Team

The sudden breakup between NBS TV’s Zahara Totto and her boyfriend, Don Solomon Ugwu alias Big Papa (Oga) continue to surface with more secrets spilled regarding their one-year old relationship.

Issues seem not light at all as we may have earlier anticipated, for the motor-mouthed media personality after another video storming social media today showing a bitter fight between Zahara and now ex-boyfriend, Don Solomon.

In the video, the mother of four is seen ridiculously nagging and clinging to her boyfriend as she begs him not call it quits in their relationship.

She is later thumped to the ground continuously by Big Papa giving her no chance again in his life.

The fight is most-likely to have been a continuation of the leaked audio where Oga was hectically trying to conclude his affair with the ‘Uncut’ show host.

Watch video here;

We will keep you posted

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Featured

Sheilah Gashumba’s relationship with boyfriend, Gods Plan on the rocks

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By BigEyeUG Writer

It seems our favourite young celebrity couple Sheila Gashumba and boyfriend GodsPlan are taking a break. Just days after city socialite Ali Marcus alias Godsplan came out on his Snapchat to reveal his break up with his long time fiancée Sheilah Gashumba, it is now clear that the two have let go of each after deleting their pictures as couple on instagram.

According to information gathered, the two who had many pictures of each other all over instagram surprised their fans when they deleted pictures of them as couple leaving their own singles.

It is said that the two love birds had reached the darkest part of it all after they both started hitting at themselves with allegations of infidelity which forced God’s plan to announce their splitting. “I can confirm me and lil stunner have parted ways,” he said.

Sheilah and God’s plan started dating three years ago and have been able to live in the spotlight as a young celebrity couple. The two have been known for living a lavish lifestyle with trips and vacations. They have been able to do things together regardless of their fights.

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Featured

Comedian Chiko officially introduced by his fiancée

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Following what the weekend had in store for Uganda’s stand up comedian Frank Mubiru better known as Chiko of the Madrat and Chiko duo alongside his fiancée Ophra, it’s clear that the two are now one.

On Sunday the 9th of August, Ophra an employee with the Civil Aviation Authority officially introduced Chiko to her family in a ceremony which was attended by his friends and family.

With excitement, Chiko shared a picture of himself kneeling down proposing to Ophra his fiancée accompanied with a caption; “LOVE is a journey starting at FOREVER ending at NEVER ….Finally”

Chiko was smartly dressed in an African Designed trouser and a long sleeved shirt.He also added shades which gave him a cool look. His fiancée Ophra pulled it off with simplicity and beauty.

However, the function was attended by a few people due to the restrictions put by the government following the outbreak of the CoronaVirus.

We wish them all the best.

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