Bad dates. Is there anything worse? Okay, there’s a lot that’s worse. Root canals. Death. Actually, a root canal would be preferable to some dates — and death might be welcomed in a few. For whatever reason, however, most people are reluctant to pull a plug on a bad date by saying, “Hey, this is a terrible date. I can’t stand you. I’m about to get up and walk quickly away. If you follow me, I will call the police.” Instead, they want to get out of it without embarrassing the other person. They just want to get home — and strategize about what to say if the person asks for a second date.
Here are 11 surefire ways to get out of a bad date:
1. Emergencies. Plenty of people mention getting a fake emergency that they have to run to deal with. Some actually ask a friend to text or call 15 – 30 minutes into the date with the agreement that if you don’t pick up, all is going well. But if it isn’t, you can do the old “Oh my god! Are you okay? Where are you? I’ll be right there!” thing and hightail it out of there.
2. Walking the dog; feeding the cat. Using pets as an excuse to leave is a great time-tested device. Usually it’s along the lines of, “Oh crap! I’m having such a good time but I just realize I forgot to feed my cat! He’s hypoglycemic. I better get home before he barfs all over my silk bedspread …” Even if, you know, you don’t have a cat.
3. Your period. Aunt Flow a can be a failproof excuse to skeedaddle. As one woman put it, “I have said ‘I’m sorry this is so embarrassing but I started my period and need to get home to change.’ They will not ask questions and it’s a fast escape.” (And if the guy offers to go buy you tampons, he might be a keeper!)
4. Wet socks. One man mentioned getting caught in a rainstorm before his date. Although his socks were only slightly wet, he made a big deal about them being soaked through and was able to scamper.
5. Later plans. A fairly easy way to get out of a bad date is to make it known before you even go that you have plans for later. That way, if the date bites, you can leave to make your other plans. If it’s going well, you can “forget” about your plans or fake a text message to reschedule.
6. Sickness. Lots of people mentioned faking illness to cut a date short. One person said: “Food poisoning? Run back and forth to the bathroom a couple times and then politely excuse yourself and run home.”
7. Kids. Single moms have a built-in excuse. The kids. You can pretty much say anything. One excuse could be, “I’m so sorry, but my kid wasn’t feeling well today. I feel like I need to get home and check on her.”
8. Bible study. This probably wouldn’t work for everyone, but one woman swears that saying she needs to get home because she has Bible study early in the morning works great. Who can argue with Jesus?
9. Just splitting. A few people admitted that they excused themselves to go to the bathroom … and didn’t return.
10. The honest approach. Not common, a few hardy souls admit to being upfront by saying something like, “I don’t think we’re quite cut out for a romantic match, but good luck to you,” and leaving.
11. The Best Excuse Ever. Casually drop that you despise sex and have never had it. The check will be there in no time.
Source: the Stir
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