By Ian Ortega
People ask if there could be any day on which it’s easier to get laid. I reply saying, that day exists and it’s probably Valentine’s Day. I will try to explain why it’s the easiest day to get laid in Uganda.
1. Single Girls feel extremely lonely on this day and will f**k any guy that gives them the slightest attention. If you go out to a bar, find a girl who’s drinking by herself. There’s a high chance that she’s single or was dumped on that day, or, she’s a prostitute. If she doesn’t name any price when you speak to her, then she’s just single and looking for a guy to spend the entire lonely night with. If she was dumped days to Valentine’s, the better, then it proves she’s all set and very ready to engage in revenge sex.
2. Virgin Girls Open Up: If you are dating a girl who’s a virgin, she will be more willing to lose her virginity on such a day that she will always remember. It doesn’t matter how conservative she is, most girls will let down their guard on this day. The mood is already primed by the red colour and the love in the air, thus most girls will always be willing to have sex with men despite past resistance to the act.
So if you wanna get laid, this is the moment to try your luck. If girls send you messages out of nowhere on Facebook or Whatsapp, those are girls looking for back-up plans. If girls call you out of nowhere to say HI, just know they’re looking for plot.