By Staff Writer
If you want to have a sex chat conversation, the only thing standing between you and your fantasy is asking the right person if they are interested. But often, this is easier said than done. How do you bridge the gap between “how was your day” and “will you take off your clothes and send me a picture?” Let’s talk about the best ways to ease into a sex chat conversation so that you optimize your chances of getting a “yes.”
Start Friendly
It’s vital not to dive right into the sex. Going too fast can make things awkward for both of you, and worse yet, it can give the impression that you’re desperate. So, take the time to talk about your day first. You don’t have to divulge anything super revealing or talk about your deepest secrets, but some small talk will help, especially if it’s friendly or flirty. You’ll have created a bit of a connection, and it will make the rest of the sex chat a lot less stressful. But don’t force a flirtation—that will seem contrived, too. Let the flirting happen, and if it doesn’t, just have some casual chitchat before you get to the good stuff.
Setting the Tone
The best thing you can do if you want to have a sex chat is to read the room. Is sex in the air? If so, you’re in a good place. You want to have an atmosphere of sexual tension, which is a lot of fun to be a part of but somewhat complicated to create. Flirting is subjective, and what some people like, other people hate, so tread carefully.
If you don’t know the person you want to have a sex chat with very well, you’ll have to be very in tune with their signals. If they laugh or don’t answer your questions, it’s time to shut it down and talk about something else.
The first thing to remember is that setting the tone doesn’t mean mentioning sex immediately. It merely means that you’re hinting at your interest in the other person. So, if you’re talking about work, you could mention how sexy you think your sex chat partner would look in business casual. Or ask how they like to unwind on the weekend. Anything that will elevate the conversation from pleasant to suggestive is perfect.
It’s always a good idea to keep the conversation positive. Many pick-up artist websites recommend “negging,” which is the idea that you can insult someone into dating or having a sex chat with you. This strategy is not very effective unless you’re interested in people with serious issues. When you take the conversation from subtle flirting to outright sexy, it’s essential to give honest compliments—not insults. Be enthusiastic about their physical appearance, and you are likely to receive the same courtesy. Body positivity is an important component of a fun sex chat experience. In fact, this sex chat professional talks about why body positivity is so crucial during virtual sex:
Some Lines to Get You Started
Chatting with someone you don’t know well? It can be especially intimidating to cross the line from friends to friends with benefits. Even people who have been in a relationship for years can feel tongue-tied about what to say to get started sex chatting. The important thing is that you check in with the person you’re chatting with frequently to ensure you’re on the same page before plowing forward. So, below are some ideas to get your creativity flowing.
- I’ve been stuck on one fantasy all day, and it involves you. Want to hear about it?
- When I picture you naked, I wonder how close my fantasy is to reality.
- I really enjoy our text conversations, but they always make me think about sex. I’ll go into more detail if you’re into it.
- I had a crazy dream about you, and full disclosure: we were having sex. I’d love to tell you about it if you want to hear more.
- I can’t stop thinking about our conversation the other night, especially when I’m in the shower.
- Sometimes I feel out of control when we’re texting, but I like it.
- You need to see what you do to me. Ready for an explicit pic?
Finding Someone to Sex Chat With
Not everyone is into sex chat, so you might prefer to find a sex chat partner online. If you want to meet someone who loves to get as wild as you do, find a site where you feel assured that your privacy is protected.