By Bessie Fox
Some people say men are looking for good sex in a relationship and women are looking for love. Some studies have shown that, no, actually it is the women looking for good sex while men are searching for some kind of connection. Well, I will have you know that at the end of the day, none of that matters – not the studies, not even what everyone else is thinking. We all desire a connection and if we connect through sex, it had better be a damn good sexual adventure. Don’t you agree? But then again, so many people care so much about opinions and how they will be perceived if they openly talk about sex.
Talking about sex is a taboo. Even when talking to our bros and sisters, some of us edit our conversations like pros, often times taking out the best parts and replacing them with generalised words or code words. We get that, sex is private, and yet sex is the most selling topic in movies, advertising, and books. So, if we are seeing it everywhere, why not talk about it? Why wait to learn the “hard” way? Why pretend like we don’t care and then secretly Google about it.
After all is said and done, we need to have good sex, responsibly of course. However, we all can’t have good sex if we fail to make good and meaningful connections with our partners and friends. The idea of good and safe sex gets distorted when we think of getting STI’s, pregnant and for many of us who are seeking a connection, the fear of getting “used” and left with a broken heart is real. We have heard about those married couples who fight everyday and sleep in different rooms. One can only imagine what kind of sex they are having, if they are getting any. Most failed marriages today are ruined by bad communication, lack of trust, secrets and unevolved expectations in gender roles. All these failings eventually trickle down to sex, hence bad sex and then no sex, and then somehow we hear that our perfect couples are cheating on each other or that they are holding on because of the kids. What gives? A frustrated relationship is equal to bad sex and once it gets to that point, we all act like the relationship is no more.
The importance of exploring all the dynamics of good sex isn’t classified but rather justified. NTV’s Chicken and Chips show is an example of taking this topic by the horns. Topics about sex and relationships are openly discussed on the show, and on their social media platforms.
Chicken and Chips is not holding back to make anyone feel comfortable or to honour taboos, nope! Rather, it is disrupting the usual way of #KeepQuiet by asking all the questions we all want to ask but won’t.
You can watch the episodes for yourself every Sunday at 1:30pm or the replay on Friday at 4pm. They include “puppet reality TV” based on real conversations, and “talk of the town” filming people answering some deep questions on the streets of Kampala, plus music videos and “social experiments” that capture people on candid camera in funny situations. Maybe you’ll have better sex once you get a chance to really talk about it!