By Ian Ortega
It has been known for many years that sex is good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a detailed study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent………… 12 Calories
Without her consent…….. 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands………… 8 Calories
With one hand………….. 12 Calories
With your teeth………….85 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection……….. 6 Calories
Without an erection……. 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris.. 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary……….…… 52 Calories
69 lying down…………..78 Calories
69 standing up……….. 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow………….. 216 Calories
Her on top……………. 524 Calories
Doggy Style…………… 726 Calories
Donkey punch………….. 912 Calories
ORGASMIC:
Real……………...112 Calories
False……………. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging…….. 18 Calories
Getting up immediately…….36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately…………….816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are
20-29 years old…….. 36 Calories
30-39 years………… 80 Calories
40-49 years………….1124 Calories
50-59 years……….. 1972 Calories
60-69 years……….. 2916 Calories
70 and over….Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly………… 32 Calories
In a hurry…….. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door… ……………1218 Calories
With your spouse knocking at the door…………….. 5521 Calories