By Moses Abeka
To those contemplating or aboard the music ship, sailing over turbulent waves, hoping to reach the island of dreams, where the sand is white and the drink is cold served by ladies in bikini, where the treasure chest lies; this is the sailors compass, the tourists map to your dream destination.
”There is more politics in the music industry than in the parliament,” Bobi’s By far intro speaks volumes. Presenting to you, the things you will not need to make it as an artiste in Uganda.
1. FRIENDS.
In this mad industry, it is hard to stay sane! When one organises a show on a certain date, another will put up a rival event coinciding with yours. You should not play games, you would rather be alone. If you are over a seniors shelter, wait and fly away.
2.TALENT
If you have more ambition than talent then you are most likely to be an overwhelming success. If the reverse is true, prepare to suffer.There is a thin line between the ambitious and talented; the ambitious will not mind singing in broken English, the talented will.
The ambitious will use intimidating lyrics that scare the talented. Lyrics like,”Watch dis, we taking over, I told you, tell dem tell dem say..yoyoyo” So the talented chicken out, why we have questions like,”Where did Tindatine go? Where is Dorothy Bukirwa? What happened to Qute Kaye and Akiki Romeo?” Such questions!
Master ambition and success will present you its eclipse pants down in broad day light.
3.MONEY
You dont have to be loaded. It is all about strategy. For ladies, if you spread your bedrrooom eclipse for a South African based native doctor or ”tycoon”, then you will definitely drive your own Benz in your videos. Just make for him music on a soft comfortable bed and you have arrived! Afterall, it is still music you are making, just that it is for a customised audience!
For guys, Dubai based business woman, the bar owner or TV presenter, are waiting for you to drill car keys, collabos, millions, houses, all out of their eclipse just like politicians did when the eclipse and CHOGM showed up.
4.PLAY AN INSTRUMENT.
Stop forcing! Can you hold a mic infront of a crowd and be audible? Then what are you waiting for?
5.LYRICISM
Just sing what you want to do in the dark and witness the magic of the dark as you become successful overnight!
6.RECORD LABEL
Forget about that!
7. VOCAL PROWESS.
What the hell? Stop running through forests, screaming your lungs on cliffs and hills, all antics in the fame of vocal training. USA has Future, Ug has….?
8.STYLIST
Just wear what you have.
9.PRO
Post whatever you want on social media including insulting Wenger and Arsenal fans!
10.ALBUMS
You don’t need! If your single is a hit, go ahead and launch it as an album plus other songs we never knew you had.
If the above does not help you, feel free to contact the writer.
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