Hand Holding:
1. Don’t be so focused on intertwining with each other that you’re inconveniencing everyone around you — I’m talking to you, couples who refuse to unlink their hands on narrow sidewalks. Your love isn’t so all consuming that it should clog a walkway.
Kissing:
2. Pecks on the lips or cheeks are acceptable as long as they are not excessive. Kissing up and down, say, an arm or a neck, would be considered excessive, and also may result in a hickey.
3. Kisses with tongue should last no more than five seconds and should be chaste enough for a PG-rated movie.
Making Out:
4. Kisses with tongue that longer than five seconds and include an exchange of saliva are considered making out. It’s not recommended to do that unless there is no one else around. I extend a pass to couples on a date having their first kiss. L’chaim! But still, try to keep it brief, young lovers.
Grabby Ass:
5. A quick butt pat is OK, a pervy butt squeezing/feel up is not. Technically, a hand in a back pocket is not offensive, just annoying. So, please don’t.
Skin Exposure:
6. Lips/tongue shouldn’t touch any area that should be covered by fabric. Diplomatically, put: stay reasonably covered in public.
Clothes Removal:
7. And speaking of staying covered…YOUR CLOTHES SHOULD STAY ON. That includes undergarments. No unbuttoning of pants or unhooking of bras.
Genital Exposure:
8. And speaking even more of staying covered…never expose pubic hair or skin near the pubic region.
Erections:
9. If you find yourself with boner, move to a non-public location immediately.
Dry Humping:
10. Grinding or any sort of sex simulation is strictly prohibited. Come on, you know that.
2nd, 3rd Or 4th Base:
11. No boobs, nipples, penises or vaginas. No touching boobs, nipples, penises or vaginas, no licking/sucking of boobs, nipples, penises or vaginas. Penetration is absolutely forbidden. DUH.
Bodily Fluids:
12. If you’ve followed all the rules above, you shouldn’t have to worry about bodily fluids because there shouldn’t be any. EVER.
Noises:
13. If you’re moaning, groaning or breathing heavy, you’re doing PDA wrong.
Getting Caught:
14. It’s safest just to do your sex/love/heavy petting/affection business in the privacy of your own home, but if you MUST do it in public, try to take care not to do it while others are around. Should you find yourself interrupted by another person or persons, common decency dictates that you will stop whatever face sucking, copulatory thing that you’re doing ASAP.
Source: Thefrisky.com